Thoughts About Modern Fatherhood


Fatherhood is sacred, as is motherhood, but in different respects. The father figure is one of the main ingredients of the glue that holds a family unit together. The father is supposed to be a leader, a guardian and a man that can occupy the emotions of both strength and love at the same time.

Sadly, fatherhood has become something of a minor role in some parts of society. Men, it seems, are thought to be sperm donors. The role of the father as we knew it has become archaic and old fashion, in a society where old fashion ways are bad and progression is the only good. And a good amount of men seem to not want to own up to their duties as fathers.

In Hollywood, fathers are bumbling idiotic figures, that always seem to be at the mercy of their children and at the other end of a much smarter and more sophisticated wife. In some cases the Hollywood father is too controlling and too demanding of his children, they never give him the ability to be both a wise loving father and a father that has a firm grasp on his household.

Society has cultivated this image of the father, in a world where instead of correcting our societal errors we tend to just make a U-turn and call that a solution. I say this in respect to the role of women in this country. A role, that to our own disgrace, did not give women the same rights as men. But that doesn’t mean that women can replace the role of the father. Certain people in society seem to want to push the idea that women don’t need men in any capacity, aside for their sperm. But the roles of men and women in respect to parenting are different. I will never deny that there are men out there that are equivalent to the scum that one might scrape off the bathroom floor. They exist and I will get to them further into this piece. I say this not to diminish women in any way, shape or form, I only say it to make the point that we must not lessen the role of the male father figure in society in the name of equality, effectively making the role of mother and father both irrelevant. I fear that if we continue down this road, much of the good traditions that we carry on from the past will get thrown out because they are connected, solely by time, to the bad traditions.

President Barack Obama, to his credit, seems to agree with this premise. He has said since the beginning of his presidency that he believes that fathers need to play a large role in the place of the American family.

Unfortunately, liberal policies have put the father in the position that we are in now. Abortion has become sort of an insurance policy for men looking to have a night of pleasure. They need not worry about getting a woman pregnant, they can always have an abortion. Yet that shows a total lack of respect for the woman and her feelings.

Taking away the emphasis on commitment and marriage before sexual intercourse has destroyed the family unit. Now men and women don’t see the need to get married before moving in with each other, and they don’t see the need to get married before they have sexual relations with each other. If a woman gets pregnant this puts the couple in an odd position. Some couples end up getting married, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t, but when it doesn’t it is not a pretty sight. When the parents don’t get married the mother generally takes care of the child. How many times have you heard the term “single father?” I should say hardly ever.

Single mothers are becoming norm and the only answer that the left has to this problem is to say that the mother can take it, she is a strong woman. But I think that there should be no shame if a single mother wants to say that it is hard and that she cannot take it. And if the woman does go there the only answer that the left then has is to bring the government into the problem. A problem that could have been avoided if only two people had been responsible and taken into account the consequences of their actions.

And to address the bathroom scum that I referred to earlier in the article. To the “men” that treat women and children like that, I have very little respect for you. When I say that fatherhood is sacred I really do mean it. There is nothing that is good about being a single mother, and if you think for one second that you should just turn and walk away, for any reason, you are sadly mistaken. This includes a child’s mother that wants nothing to do with you. I know single mothers and I know their children, and the strongest emotion that I have for any “father” that decides to put zero effort into raising their child, that they helped create, is contempt. If I were in your shoes there would be nothing, not time or space, not anything, that would keep me from having a daily loving relationship with my child! My heart breaks for the child that grows up not knowing you, not learning from you and not having you there for them. My heart also breaks for the woman left alone. I can only hope that one day you see the mistake that you’ve made. And for the women that want to push the father away, if he is making an effort give him a chance.

When it comes to children they grow up fast. You don’t want to miss a minute of it. I’ve learned all of this from watching my niece grow up. Its only been a year and a half and watching her grow and turn into a person has opened my eyes to what it might feel like to be a father. There is nothing like the embrace of a child. There is nothing like feeling needed by a child. If there is one thing that I hope and pray that I can accomplish in my time here on this earth, it is to become a father.

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